Wednesday, August 17, 2016

Of Bots and Beans by Colin Spindler

Release date: July 28, 2016
Subgenre: Humorous science fiction, short story

About Of Bots and Beans:  


Colin Spindler's CULT Group Coffee Sequence is a mystical space yarn for lovers of psychedelic science fiction.

CULT Group, a corporate entity shrouded in mystery and connected somehow to humans' colonization of Mars, is promising the impossible. It claims that the human mind can be separated from the body via a strange VR-like process called Sequencing. If CULT Group's claims check out, then human beings might just be able to cheat death.

Could disembodied immortality be at last within humanity's grasp? Or is CULT Group full of beans? The mysterious Participant sets out to investigate.

Of Bots and Beans
introduces readers to the reclusive actress Dame Saffron Von Scruplescotch, the fumbling Director Jerubimbo Gripebagger, the mysterious Participant, the eccentric ideas of Sir Francis Buildobare, and the ever-present metamorphic nanobiotech bots crawling all over everything.

Of Bots and Beans is a Kindle Unlimited short read SF fans won't want to miss.



In practice, Director Jerubimbo Gripebagger proved to be more like a nuisance than anything else. Whatever he was supposed to be doing, he was obviously screwing up.
"The directory of reasons for being Sequenced is getting longer and more cross-referenced by the day," said Director Jerubimbo Gripebagger, and then, "I won't presume to know why you've registered with us," saying, effectively, nothing.
"I've been sent to make sure you're keeping things on the up and up," the Participant might have said; or, "I have no ulterior motive. I'm simply a student of Enlightenment." Or else, said the Participant, "I want to go out of my body before I go out of my mind."
Or something else.
Something far-out, something wicked.
The Participant could very well have said all of these and more (or nothing at all), and the cumulative effect on the proceedings would've been nil. 
Participation was not yet required of the Participant.
The Voice continued, "Imagine yourself as a mind without a body, a consciousness without weight and without mass."
"Body-consciousness is a problem for everyone," said Director Jerubimbo Gripebagger.
The Voice went on, "We ask you to imagine yourself this way first, so that the Sequencer can take hold of your imagination, your evil-eyed secrets and precancerous passions..."
Muffled jangling. A low hum, gamma brightening, and then --
"The calibration is just about..." said Director Jerubimbo Gripebagger.
Director Gripebagger fidgeted with one last thing. "There! Should be good now. How do you feel?"
If the Participant had a reason for being here, for agreeing to try out this mishmash of tech-worship and temporary ego-death, it was gone, replaced with absolute calm, a sense of feeling without the imagery of the senses, being without a body, thinking without a brain.
"Excellent!" exclaimed Director Jerubimbo Gripebagger. "Move with the Sequence. Be moved by the Sequence."
Absolute calm cannot be integrated into the body's blood-reliant neural framework. Absolute calm is an inorganic condition, incompatible with being a thought-thinking, drink-drinking, walking, talking skin bag of blood, guts, bone and bile.
No calm to be had by anybody, comes the Participant's thought. Not like this.
Like the paradoxically calm feeling of hyper-focus that comes from having consumed too much coffee too quickly, absolute calm invites its own disruption.
"Your body is either a tomb or a womb. You must leave your body behind, while you still can. Your body's short-term purchase on your eternal mind is already slipping," said the Voice.
From beneath the calm surface, fear lurched on the psychosomatic scene.
To call the feeling simply "fear" would be incomplete, if not incorrect.
It's terror on a level beyond the body, divorced from the body's means of spatial ascertainment, a trembling before the divinity of death, akin to fearing without organs and the blood stream, without nerves and spinal fluid, without cortisol, without adrenaline.
Director Jerubimbo Gripebagger hummed an old tune and asked with delight, "You a ghost yet?"
"Molt and slither out of yesteryear's coil," said the Voice. "Wriggle out of your body before it's too late. Loose yourself of the bondage of the body's tyrannical demands. Participate in the world beyond. It's the most important thing you'll ever do." 



About Colin Spindler:

Aside from self-publishing coffee-flavored metaphysical space operas via Amazon Kindle Direct Publishing and Amazon Kindle Singles, Colin writes articles about video games at and

Colin lives in Durham, NC. 

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