About Double Feature:
This is a novelette of 8500 words or approx. 30 print pages.
“They’ve got the right idea,” Hank mumbled, “This is boring.”
I had to agree with him. If I watched a movie called Earth vs. the Flying Saucers, I wanted flying saucers and a lecture about satellites and three-stage rockets.
So I made out with Hank some more, while the portentous guy droned on and on, until he was finally drowned out by a whirring sound.
Hank and I didn’t much care. We were busy.
We finally had to come up for air — just in time to see that the car of Mr. and Mrs. Portentous was being assaulted by a flying saucer.
“Whoa,” I exclaimed and jumped in my seat just a little.
“Now that’s more like it,” Hank said, “Hmm, racing against a flying saucer, now that would be a coup.”
On the screen, Mrs. Portentous stammered, “Did… did I just see a flying saucer?”
I sighed. Not very smart, was she?
“Yes, you did, nitwit,” I said, “We saw it, too.”
Hank began nuzzling my neck again, while Mr. and Mrs. Portentous argued about whether the clearly visible flying saucer that had just attacked their car had really been a flying saucer.
I never learned whether Mr. and Mrs. Portentous eventually agreed that what they had seen had really been a flying saucer. Nor did I ever learn how the movie ended or who won, Earth or the flying saucers. Because at just that moment, the doors to the auditorium were flung open and Charlie and Freddy appeared, running down the aisle and waving their hands.
“Guys, guys, you’ve got to see this! It… it’s a flying saucer!”
Hank turned around, clearly annoyed.
“No need to yell. We’re watching the movie, you know?”
“No. I mean… it’s a flying saucer,” Charlie repeated, “A real flying saucer. Outside.”
At first, I thought it was some kind of publicity stunt. After all, my Mom had told me how when she was pregnant with me, she’d heard on the radio that aliens had landed in New Jersey and were attacking the country. It sounded totally real and my Mom got so scared that she promptly went into labour. But then it turned out that it was all a hoax, just a publicity stunt to promote a radio play and that there really weren’t any aliens, neither in New Jersey or elsewhere.
“Oh please,” I said, “You don’t think we’re going to fall for that one, do you?”
“And now shut up and let us watch the movie in peace or I’ll give you a load of knuckle sandwich,” Hank added.
“No, it’s true — really, it is,” Freddy replied. His cheeks were reddened with excitement, highlighting his pimples. “There’s a flying saucer right outside above the town square. It’s huge…” His hands stretched out like those of a fisherman bragging about the size of the fish he’d caught. “…and really, you’ve got to see for yourselves.”
With that, Freddy ran out of the auditorium again, followed by Charlie.
Hank and I exchanged a glance, while on the screen, Mr. and Mrs. Portentous had moved on to some kind of laboratory setting.
“It’s probably nothing, but…”
“Can’t hurt to take a look,” Hank completed, “And besides, the movie is boring anyway. And a real life flying saucer is cooler than a movie.”
“You don’t honestly believe that there’s a real flying saucer out there, do you?”
“Nope.” Hank shrugged. “But it would be cool.”