Monday, December 11, 2017

Steaks, Walls and Dossiers: The Best Trump Anthology Ever, edited by George Donnelly

Release date: December 3, 2017
Subgenre: Humor anthology

About Steaks, Walls and Dossiers: The Best Trump Anthology Ever


Time assassins. The entire nation of Scotland. Satan himself.
You thought President Donald J. Trump was outrageous? See 13 fictional Trumps combat absurd enemies in these amazing 16 short stories — the BEST ever.
Some classy but most downright ludicrous, these tremendously winning stories are going to take care of your need for entertainment, Little Reader Man. Believe me!
We’re making fiction great again for billions and trillions of incredible readers just like you. You know it, I know it, everybody knows it. Grab your copy now!
These stories are imploding, and soon will explode. To miss out would cause an absolute and total catastrophe. Buy the book now before the price goes up!
WARNING: Not suitable for low-energy types, weak men, losers, lightweights, zeros, Crazy Megyn, Crooked Hillary or Lyin’ Ted!
What are you waiting for? Do your thing, Little Reader Man!





by Pat Woods


President Trump looked at his reflection in the gold-framed, diamond-encrusted mirror. He liked what he saw.
“You’re the guy,” he told the reflection, making some of his favorite facial expressions. “You’re gonna have a great day.
“Sorry, where were we?” he said, turning back to his embattled Chief of Staff. He had forgotten this one’s name; they came and went pretty quickly.
The pale, nervous man shuffled his papers. “Bad news. The SNP—”
“Is it Baldwin? Is he back?” Trump snatched up his phone and tweeted a scathing review of the actor’s latest performance (“When will @AlecBaldwin give it up? Latest performance a joke!!! Beating a dead horse. Sad.”). He never missed an episode. He was working on his own Alec Baldwin impersonation; it was a gas.
“Ah, not SNL, the SNP. The Scottish National Party.”
“Nationalists? Like it. Go on.”
“There was a referendum—”
“You think I’m stupid?” Trump yelled, slamming his comically small fist on the desk, scattering gold sharpies. “That’s old news! I made Brexit happen, believe me! It was the Trump Effect! And it was great, bigly! People said, a lot of people, they said it was incredible. Left those clowns in the EU looking like idiots.”
“Mr. President, they’re rejoining the EU. The vote passed less than an hour ago.”
Trump considered. “Good for them,” he decided. “My mother was from there, so I’m half-Scottish. Nobody is more half-Scottish than me. Got two great golf courses there.”
“That’s the thing, Mr. President. The Act of Scottish Independence has granted all privately owned land in Scotland to the people. They’ve reclaimed your golf courses.”
Trump’s face, already an unnatural shade of orange, changed hue, passing through puce into volcanic scarlet.




About George Donnelly:

Author of dystopian, conspiracy and space opera science fiction novels that shatter the page-turning limits of freedom and the heart-thrilling cavitations of love, George Donnelly terraforms his topopolis-to-be at 22,000 KPH in near-Earth orbit, in his spare time. Former altar boy turned truancy fugitive, George is an expat vagabond who prefers zombies to aliens but is primed for any meatspace apocalypse minus grey goo. Relieve the solitude of his forlorn cryostatic exile by visiting


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